HOW TO CHANGE YOUR BEHAVIOUR

At this time of year, we often want to make changes to our lives to improve our health and well-being. Of course, like most years, when the calendar flips over to February or March we often settle back into our daily routine of bad habits and behaviors that we know we shouldn’t do. Why is it so difficult to make lasting changes? When we are confronted by difficult choices (i.e. “should I eat the doughnut?”, “Should I have just one more cigarette”), our brain does a Cost/Benefit Analysis.

We are “hard-wired” to seek pleasure. Pleasure releases a chemical in our brain called dopamine. We cannot store dopamine and as a result constantly crave it. We always choose the things that will bring us the most pleasure at that moment. Humans are pleasure-seeking missiles.

From a genetic standpoint, the release of dopamine was a way to motivate the body to continue a behavior that would benefit the species (i.e. sex, a good meal, time spent with family/tribe, etc.). Genetically we never developed a shut-off switch for dopamine because it was never necessary. Historically, we would not get dopamine from something that would kill us (ex: drugs, processed food, alcohol, etc.). Furthermore, our ancestors performed daily tasks for survival which provided dopamine, it was not optional.

In today’s society, most people have a “pleasure deficiency”, we are under constant stress, do not have meaningful relationships, have poor self-esteem, poor body image, etc. The only source of pleasure becomes food, drugs, alcohol or some other self-limiting, convenient behavior. Once dopamine is released in your body you lose the ability to make a rational decision, you have no moral compass and will continue to choose these “poor” sources of dopamine. When we make choices “in the moment” it is based on acute pleasure and controlled by our “Subconscious” mind – (our belief systems). It is our “Conscious” mind (knowledge and values) that makes choices on delayed gratification and long-term satisfaction. A good example would be a few minutes after eating the pint of ice cream you immediately say to yourself “why did I do that?”. You made the choice to eat the ice cream based on acute pleasure but after, realized with your conscious logical mind, it was a poor decision.

When your belief system becomes congruent with your knowledge and values you develop unconscious competence. To develop unconscious competence there is a valuable exercise you can do (see the graphic below). Think about the behavior you would like to add, “IF I (started exercising/eating better/meditated, etc.) I WOULD BE MUCH HEALTHIER!”. On the attached sheet in Box A – you can write down all your internal thoughts at the moment you made a decision. Next, in Box B, write down all the negative consequences of NOT adding the new healthy behavior. In Box C, write down all the positive consequences of adding the behavior. In Box D, tabulate the benefits and costs. This cost/benefit analysis can help you anchor pleasure to your new “healthy” decisions. You can even keep a card in your pocket/wallet and look at it every time you are challenged with having to make a difficult decision.

If you are able to keep up your new healthy behavior for 4-6 weeks the changes are much more likely to “stick” and become a permanent part of your behavior. Good luck with all the new healthy choices you are going to make.